it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
I will pee on everything he values.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
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