why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
