where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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