Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Send help, water and tortillas.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
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