it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
