Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
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