Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
nutella sex= disaster
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
