yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
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