Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
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