Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
