Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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