i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize