I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
