normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Randomize