It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Never joke about your clitoris.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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