Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Randomize
