how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize