She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
