oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Randomize