OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
