Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
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