Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize