Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
I fill condoms, not promises.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
I have post one night stand depression
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
Randomize
