I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Randomize
