stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
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