I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
