Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
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