do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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