she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
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