Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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