so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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