I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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