once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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