ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
