literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
