butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Randomize
