so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize