lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
Randomize
