True but thats because hes a fetus.
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
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