Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
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