You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
nutella sex= disaster
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize
