Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
