I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Randomize
