big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
