Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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