So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
