i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
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