everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Randomize
