We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
