I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
